Mrs. General Barlow - Arabella Wharton Griffith Barlow (2/29/1824 - 7/27/1864)

Sketch of Arabella by Winslow Homer (distant cousin and friend of Frank)

In an earlier blog I briefly mentioned the death of Frank's first wife Arabella. She was his true love and some would say soulmate. Arabella, like Frank, was intensely patriotic and while he fought on the battlefield she labored as a nurse never too far from where he was. Despite personal sacrifices it was their duty to serve the Union.

Her death in the summer of 1864 was devastating and more painful than the wounds he suffered. When she died a piece of him died, too. Many would comment that for the remainder of his life he had a sense of sadness about him.

In my research, I came across an article in a Rochester, NY publication, The Soldier’s Aid dated July 6, 1864. The article mentions Arabella and the work being done by the Sanitary Commission at Fredericksburg, Virginia under the direction of Chief Inspector Dr. Douglass. She was involved in the work to convert a large storehouse on Commercial Street in that city to make the building a storage facility, hospital and diet kitchen. The special diet kitchens were under the administration of Mrs. General Barlow (Arabella Griffith Barlow) along with Mrs. Woosley, Miss Gilson, Mrs. Gibbons, her daughter and Mrs. Hubbard. In large tents these women were responsible for preparing and serving the soups, coffee, soft bread and other food to the thousands of wounded soldiers and those suffering of illnesses passing through Fredericksburg.

Days before the printing of that article Arabella collapsed due to fatigue and fever. She was taken to Washington to recover. It was her work as a nurse in Fredericksburg where she contracted Typhoid Fever. A letter home from Frank to his brother Edward dated July 2, 1864 informs him that “Arabella is sick in Washington + I fear seriously. She is all run down with fever.” In a letter dated July 15, 1864 to his mother, Almira, Frank reports optimistically, that “Arabella has been seriously ill, but the fever is broken + in time she will be well again. The Smiths + Mishets have taken care of her.”

Arabella rallied briefly. Frank visited her on or about July 16, 1864 and was hopeful she would recover fully. That would not be the case. It was her tireless work in the heat, around the sick and wounded described above that took her life. Typhoid fever was taking its toll in the Fredericksburg area and Frank’s beloved Arabella was one of its victims. 

Frank’s world was shattered when he received word on July 28, 1864 while he was on the battlefield fighting during the Siege of Petersburg that she died the day before. Nelson Miles, a friend of Frank’s, wrote on August 11, 1864 that General Barlow is at present absent on account of the death of Mrs. Barlow, the loss of his wife is a severe blow to him. She was a woman of grace, independence, intelligence and had the same level of self-determination as Frank. I don't think Frank every fully recovered from the loss of Arabella. Wallace and Griffith family accounts mention that when he traveled through New Jersey he frequently stopped at her grave in Somerville.

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